


Oops

by lazaefair



Category: Eureka (TV)
Genre: M/M, Masturbation, One-Sided Attraction, UST
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-01
Updated: 2018-09-01
Packaged: 2019-07-05 06:23:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15858009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lazaefair/pseuds/lazaefair
Summary: Between his stints in L.A. and Eureka, Jack Carter thought he'd seen it all and done most of it.Set during Episode 02x11, "Maneater". Originally posted on LJ in 2008.





	Oops

Between his stints in L.A. and Eureka, Jack Carter thought he'd seen it all and done most of it.

Being commanded by Doctors Young and Blake to masturbate for sampling purposes was a new one, though.

On level with "I'm gonna kill Fargo" was "I'm never gonna get used to this town," and that thought was the fuel behind the somewhat exasperated slam of the door as he locked himself into the infirmary bathroom. And double-checked the lock. He thought about it, then triple-checked the damn thing. With his luck, Larry or someone equally unfortunate would break in with some gizmo that magically opened all locks everywhere, that they'd just so happened to develop in Section Three that day, and the Kiss-Ass would walk right in mid-wank...

Okay. Not helping. He had a semen sample to collect, and by god he was going to collect it at a speed to do his fifteen-year-old self proud. This was embarrassing enough.

There was some kind of twisted personal revelation to be had here, Jack reflected as he shed his pants and reached over to the convenient dispenser by the sinks. He was going to whack off in a GD bathroom into a GD cup for a GD medical test, his hand lubed with GD hand cream. He wondered if they were going to label every individual sperm for documentation purposes - watch via microscope as JC-456 feistily pummeled JC-892 and whapped JC-900 with its tail thingy in the race to the nonexistent egg.

Between that disturbing mental image and the memory of Fargo and his smug "need a magazine?" Jack felt the potential for possible arousal drain completely out of his body and leave him pathetically limp. Hooray. He had found the absolutely worst place to masturbate. Ever.

He closed his eyes to block out the sight of his disgruntled face reflected in the supershiny wall of the bathroom stall and refocused, concentrating on getting imaginary Allison naked. Any guilt over calling up this particular fantasy was squashed - he wanted to get this over with as soon as possible, and that meant bringing up the deepest, most private mental porn he possessed. So Allison appeared before his mind's eye. All coffee and cream, in the middle of coyly pealing off the skin-hugging lacy pink underwear he'd seen exactly once, and aha. There was the reaction he was looking for, right on schedule.

He was luxuriating in the soft skin of her inner thigh, his breathing already getting ragged, when her moan suddenly dropped three octaves and she sardonically remarked into his ear, "Why, Sheriff, didn't know you cared."

"What the--" His eyes snapped open in horror, but he was still in the bathroom and still alone. A tall, annoying, megalomaniac scientist was _not_ standing outside the stall watching in amusement as Jack jerked off. Thank god.

But he knew exactly what Stark would look like if he were actually there. Eyebrow firmly quirked, smirk in place. Jack's heart slowed down and his eyes drifted shut as he tried to hold onto the trailing edges of arousal...somehow, he found himself thinking of Nathan's half-shuttered eyes calmly surveying him as he masturbated.

Jesus, he was actually imagining it. Stark. Looking _lustful._

Jack sucked a breath in at the unexpected spike of heat, and goddammit, there was Stark sprawled all over his mental landscape. Naked. Long legs going on for miles around him, casually spread out on the mattress - his deft hands on Jack's cock, green eyes burning with slow intensity and Jack blamed it on complete and utter shock when he came harder than he had in three months.

 

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Afterwards, Jack turned the plastic cup over to Fargo and successfully repressed the urge to shuffle nervously. This was Global Dynamics, they probably took semen samples every day - and that was a thought he could've lived without, especially as he happened just then to be passing by Dr. Glenn's veterinary lab. The town in danger of being messily blown up via the sewage systems made as good an excuse as any to flee.

Thinking over what had happened in there was absolutely out of the question, so Jack blithely didn't. If he found himself randomly picturing the soft skin of Stark's chest revealed by the tantalizing dip of the man's unbuttoned shirt collar, well, he also had hordes of crazed women chasing after him trying to bash him to death with freaking golf clubs.

As for Stark's smirk and Jack's realization that he actually enjoyed the little surge of combative adrenaline he got whenever they fell into casually insulting each other, well, it all just had to take a backseat to the possibility that the males of Eureka were going to experience the prehistoric mutant ancestor of the Axe effect in a way those stupid commercials had never dreamed.

Zane was probably going to make jealous puppy eyes at him all week.

There was definitely a personal revelation to be had here. No way in hell Jack was _ever_ going to a sexual harassment seminar again.


End file.
